Unbearably HoT

If, when you make a movie, TV show, or video game your only end-goal is to sell a product to the end-user, you’re doing it wrong. To really cash in and make your media-event legendary, you need a moderately unique idea that has broad-spectrum appeal and a vocal fan-base. Why? Anyone can roll out a product that a few people will buy (ala Vanguard: Saga of Heroes), but if you’re a real market-savvy motherfucker, you know that you want consumers buying your lunchboxes, t-shirts, comic books, pins, plushies, card games, convention tickets, bed sheets—you get the idea. You want an Empire so vast that your fans will quietly grumble, gloss over the inadequacies, and chide the non-believers with a simple “I find your lack of faith disturbing” when you follow your original work with mediocre sequels. Please see the Matrix Reloaded, Star Wars Episodes I-III and Halo Wars.

More than anything else, you want to keep people talking. You need to skim over the hordes of blogs, speculative research, terrible fanfiction, and fanmade monstrosities because they represent Your People. Your People aren’t interested in the money, but rather the product and the direction it will take in the future—they are your glorified cash cows, and it would do you well to keep them well-groomed and fat. Don’t get me wrong; following that formula isn’t necessarily the path one takes to create a “perfect product”—just a well-marketed one. Keeping the masses happy, however, doesn’t always require pandering—just a healthy dose of watchful minding and respect.

We can argue all day whether Blizzard has been feeding casual-cows and destroying the challenge of the game in direct proportion to a rise in profits, but they do a more-than-acceptable job in reaching out to the community. They read our blogs. They regularly publicize fanart and recently championed a creative writing contest. There are a number of in-game tributes to helpful players (see: Phaelia’s Vestments of the Sprouting Seed and quest-reward items named after DK beta testers), memorials (think: Ezra Chatterton), geek-culture references, regular responses to fan-questions and demands via forums, GM visits, Blizzcon—really, we WoW players are a pretty lucky (and simultaneously gullible) bunch.

Why risk invoking the ire of the Internet community that so celebrates the machine by threatening creative fans with legal action? I’ve been pondering that very question since I heard that Shakes & Fidget, makers of an e-famous WoW comic, were hit with a Cease & Desist order. I cannot pretend to know the fine-details, even with the ability to read German, but I fail to see the problem with what’s essentially a “free” comic that popularizes Blizzard’s universe. “But they’re making money from merchandise and advertising!” the finger-wagglers wail, “Blizzard has every right to stop them!” This is correct, if indeed S&F are making money from the comic. I am not totally convinced.

Blizzard has the right to make sure that no one else makes money off of their copyrighted material—but the real question is whether folks like Shakes & Fidget are in any way, shape, or form cutting into the deck of Blizzard’s profits. Are they feasting off a glut of Euros, or are they funding hosting costs for their WoW-tribute comic? Is it even enough revenue to be taxed? Are they selling merchandise that directly competes with a 2nd party vendor like J!NX? I could be wrong. Maybe Blizzard isn’t worried (and shouldn’t be, for that matter) about the monetary aspect, but rather find that comics such as S&F’s “defame” their image. Straight from Blizzard’s legalese:

“…Also, we reserve the right to revoke this limited use license at any time, for any reason, and at the sole discretion of Blizzard Entertainment®. You may not use our materials on sites that feature defamatory, pornographic, or inflammatory content, including, but not limited to, hacks and cheats for any of our games or any other content that Blizzard Entertainment® find objectionable or unlawful.”

Judging from the general content of said comic, we can rule out “defamatory,” “pornographic,” and “inflammatory.” I also haven’t stumbled across any private servers at S&F’s website, nor have I found any roll-hacking mods. Blizzard—or shall I say ActivisionBlizzard—has seemingly invoked the “for any reason” clause. To what purpose? The new add-on policy (although arguably harmless) coupled with these first-tier Cease & Desist orders seem to represent an ever-darkening cloud on the horizon, and I’m admittedly a little worried. S&F wasn’t the first (as the creators of the WoW iPhone applications can attest to), and they won’t be the last. Who’s next? Penny Arcade? LFG? Astrylian, the creator of Rawr? Me? For once, I’m glad I’m not nearly that popular.

You, as a reader and as a consumer, should be upset about this. ActivisionBlizzard is more than willing to lap up the monthly subscription fees, transfer and name change dollars, Arena Tournament entry costs, Blizzcon ticket sales, and extensive merchandising opportunities, but may be increasingly tight-fisted when it comes to “sharing” their World. Blizzard’s content is not only enriched by new hardware and a slick design team, but also by the tremendous support and ancillary creativity of the players who populate it.

In a little over three weeks, I’ll be shutting off my computer and heading east to get married. While I’m gone, my guild will inevitably kill Yogg-Saron (if we don’t do it tonight), and Blizzard will drop the earth-shattering news that they’re adding 122 more pets to the game and the ability for Druids to reskin themselves into robots. Something like that. In the meantime, Unbearably HoT will languish without any sort of regular posting, and for the first time, I’m going to be looking for guest bloggers. Yeah, that’s right—I need two or three exceptional writers to contribute a post about Feral Druiding.

Here’s the deal:

• You’ve got until May 18th to submit to me a well-structured, mostly grammatically correct article about Feral Druids. Use my Contact page.
• I will choose anywhere between one and three winners based on the quality of the work. I appreciate current news, accurate information, and clever wit.
• The winner(s) will receive a prize, including but not necessarily limited to, an XBOX Live Gamecard and credited publication on my site.
• Do you need to be a blogger already? No, but if you are, let me know what site you write for.
• Do you need pictures? No, but if you come up with something awesome, include that as well.
• Do you need to be working on end-game content? No, but I’m not interested in leveling guides/specs. It doesn’t have to be on game mechanics, either. If you have a sweet op-ed about Ferals, send it my way.
• All rights to your articles are reserved by YOU.

For further clarification, because I’ve already received a number of inquiries but no actual articles, I’m not looking for a cover letter and a resume (although I appreciate the effort)—just an article. Questions? Comments? Drop me a line. I hope to see your entries soon!

They were crazy enough over at Twisted Nether to ask me back on the show, even after that stint I did with Phaelia last September. This time, however, I joined a group of five other bloggers (Hydra, Maerdred, Lassirra, and Anna) along with hosts Fimlys and Nibuca for a round-table discussion about the latest patch changes. I’m fairly quiet throughout (as it was getting past 3 a.m. my time), but I still pipe up with a few opinions here and there. Thanks to all the intrepid listeners who stayed up to dick around in the chatroom for this live presentation. Go give it a listen!

Recently, I was asked what I thought about Feral DPS in Ulduar. This pretty much sums it up:

For reference purposes, this is just a Recount screenshot from an old XT-002 attempt. These numbers are on the high end but are typical for that encounter. This is partially because you do double-damage during the “heart” phase, and also because XT-002 functions as the new melee Patchwerk. You can assume normal 25-man raid buffs (flasks, food, Kings, your mom), Hysteria, and Speed Pots. Additionally, I’d just like to note that the comingling of Naxxramas and Ulduar gear is a little terrifying. Look forward to my latest and greatest updated DPS gear lists coming tomorrow!

After scanning the flutter of e-mails this morning asking what my impressions of 3.1 were, all I can really say is that I logged on half-asleep at 1 a.m. when I got back from Distant Worlds and half-heartedly respecced. In my somnolent haze I didn’t even bother inputting my Bear build—I bought it and then remembered mounts could swim when I fell into Lake Elune’ara. I also started the first of the quests for the Argent Tournament, mostly because I’m determined to get as many pets as possible, and then hearthed back to Dalaran for Fishing Dailies (that I didn’t do, because I somehow took the portal to Stormwind). No excuses, kids. Play like a champion, m I rite?

Though I did miss out on our guild’s first forays into Ulduar (because partying with Uematsu took lead on this one), it seems as though many players in general experienced an enormous amount of lag and/or critical errors when entering the instance. Our guild had little trouble with the Flame Leviathan but soon discovered that Ignis was fundamentally bugged and near impossible to kill in that state. Awesome. If the emergency maintenance today is any indication, Blizzard is likely rectifying many of these issues as we speak and I’ll have a more comprehensive report of Ulduar tomorrow. In the meantime, here are few articles that I’ll be working on updating for your reference pleasure:

• SUPER New Two-handers that will make your pussy go wild! Armor penetration ratings need to be adjusted, and new items are being discovered all the time. A downloadable weapon spreadsheet is on the to-do list for this week.
• Mixology 101. While the lists of consumables remains the same, the weighting of various stats has changed (along with mechanics of key abilities, such as Savage Roar). As such, Elixir of Major Agility and Elixir or Armor Piercing edge out the Flask of Endless Rage (although flasks are still generally preferable for times when you know you’ll be wiping).

What else can you expect to see soon?

• A new guide to eatables.
• DPS gem guide. Bottom line? Start turning those Scarlet Rubies into Delicate and Fractured sparklies.
• Breakdown of a rotation that capitalizes off of Armor Penetration v. one that benefits primarily from AGI.
• A tanking revisitation. As of now, I’m officially getting slotted as an off-tank for trash and various other encounters and as such, will refocus much of my attention to maximizing that discipline. For recent Bear ramblings, please visit Karthis and Kalon at Of Teeth and Claws and ThinkTank, respectively.

Keep the questions coming!