Exeunt.
It happens. Guilds are halfheartedly disbanding as raid numbers dwindle, leaving longtime home-realms to reroll elsewhere or igniting at that one, final flashpoint and exploding. Why? Maybe folks have seen what they want to see, and have moved on. Perhaps other games have lured people away. Maybe the gap between the BT/Hyjal release and the opening of the Sunwell may have tired early T6 farmers, that guilds farming BT/Hyjal may not have been prepared for Sunwell’s ramped up difficulty, that general summer ennui set in as vacations and finals rolled through, and that with Wrath of the Lich King looming on the horizon, many would rather just sit back and start preparing for the storm. I’m not the first to write about this, and I won’t be the last.
And I’ve had it. It takes a lot more than minor discontent to burn-out someone who’s been progression raiding for over two years. I waited a little while for the dust to settle, take care of some real life concerns and, you know, get my rogue to 60, but here, in list format, is why I quit Singularity and took a break from progression raiding.
Loss of Core Raiders and Attendance Issues
Over the past few months, we had (not entirely out of the ordinary) moments of great shame, and moments of great triumph. We freed Kalecgos, destroyed Brutallus, survived Felmyst and even managed to start in on some rather discouraging Twins attempts. Meanwhile, we were practically bleeding raiders. Geared, competent apps were growing fewer and farther between, and with a sudden explosion of real life issues (marriage, familial difficulties, school), we lost a solid portion of our officer core as well.
In my opinion, some of those folks were the people who really pulled everyone together and focused our efforts to the knife-point necessary to dissect encounters. They were incredibly vocal, critical people, and more importantly, they had the officer tag that allowed them to enforce what they said. The final loss of our raid leader and GM (who actually re-rolled to play with Juggernaut) nearly nailed the coffin-lid shut—on both the guild and my desire to raid. People can’t just be given the officer tag and be expected to lead—authority and trust are two essential qualities that have to be developed over time. Rapidly attempting to metamorphose raiders into new officers didn’t quite work as I had hoped, and my outlook on the situation grew progressively bleaker.
Attitude
I have always considered myself a valuable asset to any raid group: I’m punctual, I’m prepared, I’m a superior player with quick reflexes, and I add a certain, wildly inappropriate something to a raid group. Let’s call it “levity”. As any leader knows, there’s a time and a place for goofing off, and there’s a lot to be said for boosting morale. Generally speaking, I have a knack for doing and knowing just that. It’s not exactly a designated job, but when I’d returned to raiding after my week off, I got a surprising flurry of tells from folks asserting that things had been “boring” without me around. That’s cool. That’s my goal, so to speak.
Unfortunately, not everyone else has this same mentality. If there’s something to complain about, it’ll be complained about, and if they can show up late and play like a half-assed retard, they’ll do that as well. If they can get away with it. Certainly this doesn’t apply to everyone, and perhaps the people who did fall into that pattern had some kind of real life issue to work out. But when that sort of behavior largely goes unnoticed or unpunished in a situation where 24 other people are counting on you, it’s unacceptable. It generates resentment, both toward the leadership and toward your fellow players, spreading like a disease cloud of malcontent.
So when someone like me, who just a few months ago attempted to drive morale and progression with a massive consumable gathering expedition, suddenly finds herself bitter and frustrated and dreading logging on to a veritable shitstorm of ill-geared apps and people who seemingly don’t care anymore, what happens? It dragged on me. I got angry. I found fewer reasons to justify the mental exhaustion from raiding 10:00 p.m. to 1:30 a.m. on work nights. I unwittingly allowed my own irritation to bleed over in-game, and that, in my opinion, was also unacceptable and needed to change.
Raid Role
Many folks have periodically written about why tanks have such a high burn-out rate. While you can say the same thing about almost any class role, tanking isn’t easy. Let me rephrase that—effective tanking isn’t easy. There is a very high reliance on proper rotations, optimizing TPS output, utilizations of life-saving cooldowns, gear, quick-decision making, and…everyone else. I won’t digress into a tanking discussion here, but whether or not you have an official raid leading role, as the tank, you are often situated there. You lead, quite literally. You often pull. You manage mobs and their respective positions to the raid. You save all the people who mismanage aggro and the healers keeping you alive. And best of all, you’re in a prime position to screw up, repeatedly, and have everyone watch you do it.
That being said, other than watching your own damage output scale directly with TPS, doing everything correctly as a tank still doesn’t guarantee success. As Lycentia loves to say, “Tanking is watching everyone else fail around you.” While the amount of tanks necessary for any given encounter varies, most guilds have a much smaller pool of tanks than they do healers or DPS. Fewer tanks means stricter attendance and a heavier reliance on a small group of people: if a rogue can’t make it one night, you sub in more DPS. If one of your only FR tanks for Illidan can’t make it, you’re in trouble. A lot of time and effort goes into training and gearing tanks, and a lot of people take that for granted. It is, arguably, the most stressful non-officer position in a raid, and even considering leaving saddled me with some rather impressive guilt. A friend actually told me:
If you didn’t want to put up with everyone’s bullshit, you shouldn’t have rolled a tank. Leaving kind of bones everyone.
Relatively shocked, I responded with:
So by virtue of me playing a tank, I am thus held to some invisible higher standard than every other class? That I should continue to play even when I’m not having fun anymore just because I happen to be a tank?
Needless to say, the conversation ended there when both of us realized how dumb it sounded. But those expectations do exist, and I steadily grew tired of them.
Conclusion
That’s essentially the lion’s share of my reasoning for stepping back for awhile and focusing on general makeouts and high fives. I harbor no ill-will toward Singularity at all, especially since many of my friends still play there, and I have no intentions of transferring. Doomhammer is “it”, but it is currently my intention to prepare for competitive 10-man progression raiding in WotLK. With that in mind, myself and the other two tanks who left (along with a few friends) have created a new guild, with a new “charter”, so to speak, to move toward that goal.
I present to you:
DREAD LOBSTER
Recruiting will actually happen soon. Extensive class knowledge, tolerance for multisyllabic words and deliberately unreasonable requests a must. If this is something you’re seriously interested in, talk to me.
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Not looking fer a guild, but I loves the name. Best of lucks to ya!
@Ratshag
Lol, glad you like. To be honest, we’re really just dicking around right now, farming gold and farming bear mounts. Our goal was to have something like 20k each by the time the expansion hits. We’ll see.
to be honest with you, you were one of the reasons the people got disgruntled with your constant whining and bitching about buffs. once the loot train ended you all got off and good riddence. no hard feelings though , intellectually i thought you were one of the brightest people to talk to. good luck to you all. We as always will be fine.
@Valgoth
Well, Val, I’m sorry you feel that way. I’m not entirely sure what bitching about buffs you’re talking about unless you mean getting Salv all the time when tanking. We didn’t get off “when the loot train ended”, because really, if I had just been in it for loot, I would have stuck around a lot longer for the pieces I still didn’t/don’t have from T6 content.
As I said, I do wish Singularity the best, and I’m particularly glad you guys are still doing well. I think it’s a little unfair to fault me for not wanting to raid anymore, especially since I have a new job, but you are, of course, entitled to your opinion.
Additionally, I had offered to help with anything non-raiding related that you guys needed, and that offer was extended to both Kal and Kirkie. If you’d like copies of what I sent to them, by all means, I’ll provide them to you too. I have an excess of mats that I farmed for various pots/etc. but no one has taken me up on it yet.
I enjoyed raiding with you, and I enjoyed your sense of humor (also, pharmacological advice).
it’s still a “game” with people I enjoy and have enjoyed for 3+ years. The time was right for you I am sure to leave with health , job, ect. What is considered “fishy” though is the leaving of all the tanks at once, which was not pre-planned, lol . Come on , you think Mr prot pally just decided the same day to leave and roll with your new 10 man and never talked to you or lyc. And I was serious about your intellgence, dont waste it. I can see big things in RL from you if you put your mind to it. Difference of opinion i guess. I wanted to be part of the solution more than add to the problem. I always tell my kids , quitting is easy sticking it out increases your character and strengthens your personal values. Good luck though, it was a fun ride til the end .
@Valgoth
I can’t speak for Tomy, except for the fact that his DK plans are ridiculous and extensive and have seemingly consumed him. Obviously Lyc and I had to talk about it; we raid in the same room and need to work off of each other’s schedules. One of us really couldn’t leave without the other and expect our relationship to stay balanced; raiding is about 17 hours a week, and that’d be like spending another part time job away from one another in addition to the “actual” jobs we have.
Also, for the record, that’s not “my” new 10-man. Lyc and I didn’t create it. That’s Tomy’s baby. Lyc and I were going to dick around in some catch-all guild for he and I and maybe some IRL friends, but Tomy asked us to help him with it, so we joined.
And I appreciate what you’ve said. Right now, I’m just happy to be working (after applying to eight million jobs) and in the meantime catching up with my writing. If we can get out of this awful state, I may even get back into politics. Adding to the problem would have been staying with the guild and allowing my attitude/exhaustion to deteriorate and influence others. I’m no “quitter”, but if I’m going to take a break from something I’ve been doing for 2+ years, it’s going to be a game rather than something I do out in the real world.
Keep in touch, if you like, and if anyone else has any other questions or concerns, I would be more than happy to discuss them rather than hear rumblings second-hand from friends.
O hai, I’m “Mr. Prot Pally” for those of you keeping score at home. We always advise new readers to grab a pen and paper.
I learned a great deal in Singularity and grew tremendously as a player, but sadly the guild shriveled. Runy did a good job in outlining the blows which Sing suffered and I won’t bother recapitulating them, but look at the facts. If you had asked me who the top three officers in Sing were whom I most respected and referred to, there is no question that Frost, Brand and Czer would have have topped the list. They are all gone. Our only MH glaive is gone at the hands of a Rogue who gemmed solely for Agi—who was also a top officer. The entire leadership has been gutted of the only strong, knowledgeable voices to whom we turned for guidance on strategy and progression. Is it so surprising that the loss of an entire chain of command might demoralize their followers?
I assure you, Valgoth, that there is nothing that I could have offered Lyc and Runy to compare with a run at Kil’jaeden. If everything in Singularity was still going as smoothly as it was at Felmyst, I would have had no power to seduce them. Unfortunately, that is not the current state of affairs. We did not leave in order to execute a grand conspiracy and stab Singularity in the back—we each left for our own concerns and would have done so in the absence of Dread Lobster. Having left, we made the best of our situation and decided to continue playing together. That is our prerogative. A guild which had been established last August and which already had banking tabs was the natural choice.
And another thing. I’m a Paladin, and I’m one of the people who had to deal with the “constant whining and bitching about buffs.” One of the principle functions of a Paladin in a raid environment is to assign Blessings to maximum effect and vary those assignments based upon the situation. Being asked to do this is not unreasonable: it is the reason why your class was offered a raid invite in the first place. This is not difficult to accomplish with Pally Power. If removing a Salv from a tank with a BoW or a BoF or tossing a BoM on the Feral instead of BoL is too taxing, perhaps raiding as a Paladin is not for you.
In conclusion, R E A D A B O OKAAAAAAY.
Congrats on the new guild! Glad to see you are moving on the better and brighter things. Don’t feel bad about taking a break, this isn’t the third grade-this is your sanity. Take my husband for an example…
My husband is the main tank for our guild and even when it was going better than your situation, the stress really gets to him. It nearly broke his enjoyment of the game. He got so overloaded once, he didn’t play for nearly 3 months. He was miserable the whole time-when he was playing and when he wasn’t.
The pressure we all put on our tanks is so great, and everyone should be a lot more grateful that you bear it for as long as you do-often without thanks.
Why am I not surprised Runy is drama queenin’ it up over here?
O wait, that’s an easy answer! I’m not surprised because she is a drama queen; tried and true. I don’t have to pontificate anything to say that, either - you should take note.
From what it sounded like, you were a secondary tank. People left you outside the portal a lot. People killed major bosses without you. So what we have here is a guild princess pretending she can tank and finding out she can’t when people get sick of her attitude. QQ! Anyone who has read your WoW diatribes can attest that you aren’t particularly skilled. You can talk the talk, but you can’t walk the walk at all. Big words and elongated phrases do nothing to hide the fact that you probably keyboard turn and were the type of bear that socked strength until reading EJ.
So what happens when Princess gets mad? Princess leaves, after writing a TL;DR, and takes some of her pussycats with her. I’m sure Sing is much better for losing you, and your little guild will fail with the next drama bomb set up by you.
Also, stop trying to sound hxc and blog about your progress. “Cockblock” is not what Sing experienced with Eredar Twins. A cockblock is when an encounter is broken, you stupid cunt. The Twins are damn easy and not remotely cockblocked - especially not a C’thun cockblock as you so boldly wrote.
Anyway, good luck with your PvP! Resto Druid + anything is one of the best combinations, but I’m sure we won’t see any S4 Netherdrakes from Queen Runycat.
Here’s a tip: LB stacks 3x. Just in case you didn’t know.
@LOL
Your entire post suffers by your hiding behind “LOL” rather than announcing yourself. If you’re just some random troll, that’s fine though I tend to doubt it. Only a truly lonely person would put up such a long post about people they don’t even know. The amount of effort suggests to me that you know Runy and are probably a member of Sing. But hey, I’ve been wrong before, maybe you are just some internet dickwad.
Also, “Drama bombs” usually involve a lot more bitching and foul, ignorant language. Runy’s post seems pretty respectful and honest to me. Come to think of it, actual drama bombs look a lot like your post. That’s kinda ironic…huh, weird.
Anywho, if you ever check this thread again (which I’m sure you will because no one writes something like that without gleefully come back to see how people reacted to it. Oh aren’t you so mischievous, you rascal!) feel free to try and flame me or something. Just know I won’t be responding.
Should you really like to chat about this and badmouth Runy in person though, feel free to stop by Champaign, Illinois anytime and we can have a nice chat. It will end with me knocking your fucking teeth out. (See, I can be an insulting dickhead too!)
@LOL
You sure know me! You’re definitely wildly accurate. Even folks who didn’t like me in Sing could, I’m sure, attest to the fact that I knew what I was doing. Feel free to continue posting; I need a good laugh.
@Raiek
Hi, there. Don’t bother responding to anything like that; anyone who’s played with me knows otherwise.
Don’t worry about the hate tells you may have gotten about the responsibilities of tanking, we’ve already had new folks in to replace those slots, and I honestly think we are stronger than ever. It was sort of Sing’s fault for letting a couple be MT/OT - it ran a high risk for the guild that we’d eventually get burned, and it added pressure to you and Lyc to stay longer than you wanted. Your discontent was obvious, and I hope you are happier now taking a break and mapping out new goals in WoW and real life.
The commentary and blog here I believe is painting a picture that Singularity has no leadership and crumbled. As someone who has stayed and put a lot of effort into the direction and recruitment goals of this guild, I can attest that it has not. The guild is fine, we’ve filled in slots (without compromising the quality of the players we’ve accepted to trial) in record time. There is still chatter and laughter during trash, there is leadership for developing our new players, and we’re excited to down some new content soon.
When you are knocked down, you can either slither away, or grab a fistful of sand. We have some real fighters with us, and I’m proud to raid alongside them. There will be more new kills under Singularity before WoLK hits.
Best wishes for you in Dread Lobster - this server is too small to harbor ill feelings toward anyone for trying something different.
@Kirkie
Well, I’m sure you might have realized that it wasn’t my intention to give the impression that Sing is dead; all you have to do is log in and do a /who Singularity and see what you guys are up to. As I’ve written here before, guilds are bigger than one or two or even three people, and that every single one of those people is replaceable. It’s no different here. Even with us leaving, Sing still had 3+ great tanks that were good to go, so I can’t say I was worried on that front.
Basically, everything that happened in an incredibly short span of time (both in game and out) was enough to kill the desire I had to raid and force me to re prioritize. For quite some time, I thought you were pretty angry and ready to leave as well. I said it before and I’ll say it again, I don’t hold any grudges toward Sing in the least and I wish you the best; I had a great time during my eight month tenure there, and it’s those people I met that made me want to stick around on Doomhammer.
I realize that this post was linked to in the officer forums, and that’s fine. My intention was not to create drama of any sort, as referenced by my cowardly anonymous poster, but rather to illustrate to the people beyond Doomhammer, who actually read this blog, why I’m not doing what I’m doing anymore. People notice when your tags change and when you’re not writing about progression anymore.
So it’s not about wanting to find another guild or a guild more progressed or a guild with a different leadership structure or anything; I just don’t want to do it anymore, and I want to be able to get a good night’s sleep. You know this.
But I’m still around if you want to do whatever. Just not so late on weeknights anymore. Take care, yo.
I quite enjoyed LOL’s post. Trolling always makes me giggle, and LOL’s was one heckuva troll post.
It had everything. Insults. Powerful curse words juxtaposed with very weak curse words to make each seem more powerful. Long words, clever turns of grammar, it was all there.
Encore! Encore!
Good luck to both Singularity and Dread Lobster. It’s always great to see both guilds that survive raider bleed damage and those who find a way to have fun in the game again.
Best wishes!
@Euripedes
It’s certainly pathetic seeing someone hide behind “anonymity” by posting under a fake “name” through a proxy IP address, isn’t it? I personally enjoy insulting people face-to-face, or at least on my own name. Regardless, it’s not difficult to see how vastly ill-informed, bitter, and cowardly “LOL” is. It would have at least been a little more fun to read insults that actually made sense.
@Bellwether
Thanks! As I’ve probably mentioned multiple times already, we’re just dicking around and getting our friends bear mounts, currently. And farming obscene amounts of gold. So far, so good.
Hi, i’d just like to wish you the best of luck, if i wasnt in such a great guild myself, and on us servers i would have probably contacted you in regards to Dead Lobster.
I’m happy for you that your enjoying playing again by the sounds of it. i always find it depressing when people stop playing thegame after events such as this, and i’m glad that your not one of them
now gogo get those bear mounts
@Nichgoul
Thank-you. Truth be told, I do miss tanking ridiculous shit, but my schedule now is a million times better than before; I seriously can’t afford to be a zombie at work nowadays. I also enjoy the ten-man synergy very much, especially the kind needed to efficiently farm up bears for everyone (which are pretty cool; it’s like riding a dune buggy with fur).
The goal is to eventually create a competitive environment (in WotLK) that we can tailor to our particular schedules. I think it’ll work out.
Thanks again!
1) Twins dead….we win
I heard from Lealiaa, actually, and I congratulated him; however, when I went to the main page and saw the incredibly puerile commentary written there, my desire to cheer with you guys pretty much died down.
Bitter much? I say yet again: if I was interested in more loot, I would have gone elsewhere or would have stuck around for the three items I was next in line for from farm bosses.
Good luck charging on–I’m going to be making wedding plans.
You won? Do It Well did it better, and got him first. Valgoth, you’re a pathetic geriatric, stop pretending like you have any idea what the hell is going on with Runy or myself, and just stay the fuck off this site. You’re a relic in real life, and you can’t play worth a shit in World of Warcraft, you limp-dicked, keyboard turning fucktard.
BTW on a more serious note, congrats on the impending marriage. I dont hold grudges to anyones personal life, and you’re a really bright girl runy. I enjoy reading the blog too, its well written and has good content. Peace and good luck to you both.
You say that you don’t hold grudges, and yet I see things like the commentary on Sing’s main page and your “Twins dead…we win” comment (notably posted on this page with the “we win” addendum, as though you’re either trying to prove something or rub it in) and can’t help but think otherwise.
I dislike that I need to reiterate this: I didn’t want to raid anymore, and I stopped. I decided to let my personal life have some breathing room. We did not go to another raiding guild or anything of the sort; we’re chilling out on Doomhammer, and we’re leveling alts.
If you like this blog or how I write, that’s fabulous, and if you’d like to discuss the blog, then please feel free to comment. If there’s something you’d really like to get off your chest, however, please refrain from posting anything else here: use my Contact Form or talk to me in game (which you have not done yet; you’ve decided to air whatever grievances you have publicly, as though my reputation could somehow be damaged). Any other disparaging comments or implications about me or my fiancee will not be tolerated and will get you a banned IP address.
I never imagined that stepping down from raiding would earn such scorn from people I thought were my friends.